Friday, June 22, 2012

I Choose the Change





People don’t always know that they are putting you through shit. And even you don’t always realize that what they have been serving you all along, with the salad of love and sauce of care, was basically shit that has done you no good. But the real fun begins when you realize that you want something different on the menu and decide to ask for it. And if you find, after quite a few requests of re-orders, that the menu is not going to change, you simply stop coming there. Which, in this case, means that you block all the previous communications.

Now, this may seem rather random for the person on the other end, but trust me, you are not to be blamed. If there is anything I’ve learned from my years of being the good girl who knew not how to answer back, then it is the fact that you are not mistreated until you allow the other person the liberty to do so.

You don’t need to take shit from anybody. Nobody is more important in your life than you. And if it’s some kind of guilt or gratitude or even old-time’s-sake holding you down, be brave to accept that nothing is worth the effort if it can’t let you be who you are.

And if you think it’s love, then I’d trust your better judgment to tell you that it’s not love if it ties you down. The person on the other side may not even realize that they are having such a negative impact on you. But it’s your responsibility towards yourself to accept the fact if it’s true. It’s never too late to start over. Never too late to make a fresh beginning. Never too late to start living the way you want to.

Sunday, June 10, 2012

Simantini Almighty





It was just this morning when I was playing with a bucket of water and trying to make world out of the layer on top of the water when, paradoxically, a profound thought hit me, perhaps quite like a truck for I could not stop thinking about it till I finally it wrote down. I think the profoundest of thoughts hit us when we are doing the silliest of things. So never underestimate anything silly!

Anyway, that was a digression, and let me tell you where I was. So, how would it feel like to be God? Sorry to all the conventional religionists, for you could take this as blasphemy. But I’m just wondering, you see. I am neither an atheist, nor a devout. I am just trying to find out, how would it feel to create something as beautiful as the Earth out of nothing, and decorate it and give it innumerable forms of life and then watch them rot and die every moment?

I wonder, does God feel helpless sometimes? There are so many of us calling out to God (I’ll refrain from using a pronoun to make sure I don’t give God a gender). How does God even keep record of all the appointments? “God’s God”. That’s the answer I’ll get from the ‘grown-ups’. But what if I was God?

At first, I don’t think I’d be able to decide what to do with the infinity. Why do I have to make the Earth round? If I've made all the other planets round, but given Saturn a few rings to play with, why I can’t I make Earth a square or triangle? I guess my own rules of space. So you see? God isn’t that free as we think God to be. God couldn’t get away from own rules. There was this Bangla song about a similar topic, anyway.

So now that I’d be enough pissed as God to know that I can’t give a simple shape to the Earth according to my wishes, I’d have to stick to the round one. Alright, after that comes the topography. By the way, my 9-year-old student tried to pronounce “topography” and said, “It’s easier to say ‘physical features’.” So I thought that perhaps we unnecessarily complicate matters to make them look sophisticated, while the easier answer is usually right in front of our eyes.

Digressed again. Coming to the ‘physical features’. I love the way God has created the tectonic plates. They can move around as they wish, though they are not as alive as I’m making them sound. They don’t remain stationary, unlike quite a few of us who can’t be moved from the tv-couch or bed or computer chair!

As for the detailing and garnishing, I think God had done it as a regular co-curricular activity. Sorry for making it sound mundane, especially if you’d been hoping for a let-there-be-topography-and-the-mountains-started-growing stuff. I don’t blame the poor soul. I’d have done the same thing if I was left alone with an unexplored piece. I’m happy God took time and made a masterpiece out of the boring sphere.

And then came life!

I don’t believe in the whole Eden Garden concept. I’d much rather believe in deteriorating-from-the-monkeys theory. The reason our own Eden (Kolkata) can’t handle the pressure is mainly because the original inspiration – the former imaginary one – was not a real one. So we have all these crumbling down of parts of the stadium in every 6months. It has now become more or less a routine - either a huge power-cut or people pushing and rushing or the dhor-mor collapsing of some part of the gallery.

Had I been God, I think I’d be pretty much disappointed with the way the world has turned out. Almost like a promising child gone wayward.

(Sorry for the abrupt end. Maa dakche. If she comes to know ami blog-e lokjon ke gyan dichchi, I’ll be done for the day :P )